Bernard Bunsen
Can’t in good conscience hurt a friend, so I guess that means I give up. Funny how that works, eh?
Bernard Bunsen is a participant of Crab 2, as a member of Team Chads. He is a jolly apocalypse survivor working for a company that exterminates anthros seeing them as a plague for the world, a job he performs without qualms.
Appearance
Personality
Bernard is a hardworking and earnest man, constantly aspiring to do his best to improve the lives of those remaining on his world. Because of his survival during an apocalypse on his homeworld Bernard aspires above all to prevent any more catastrophic loss of life and end the post-apocalyptic struggle of his home. He is always willing to help someone in need if he sees they need it and vividly remembers acts of kindness done towards him or others. Despite his home being in such dire straits Bernard is not utilitarian enough to willfully sacrifice or kill innocent people to grasp salvation for his world.
He is courageous and loyal to a point. If pushed to violate his moral compunctions Bernard will not indulge in cruelty, depravity, or sadism. He approaches elimination tasks with grave seriousness but can be convinced otherwise by appealing to his sentimentality.
Powers and Abilities
Bernard has no supernatural abilities that are beyond a normal human’s when push comes to shove. His pain tolerance is perhaps the best he has, as he’s capable of mentally powering through serious injury to keep moving in life or death situations. He is strong enough to lift his own body weight and fit enough to run for sustained periods of time. While his strength and stamina is good his dexterity is fair and he can easily be overwhelmed by someone speedier and smaller than he is.
Bernard’s best answer to a real fight is his access to Apex technology from his homeworld. His zero gun and zerozooka are both weaponry designed by Apex industries, designed to completely disintegrate most matter into a fine white powder when struck by their concentrated laser rays. Both weapons have cool-down meters and cannot be consistently fired, though it takes longer for the zero gun to reach its heat limit for cooldown compared to the zerozooka, which must have a long cooldown after each use. His personal transport Sue carries extras of these weapons and operates a hoverbot which can carry a grown human as it flies through the air.
Background
History
Round 1
Bernard Bunsen and Leuca (won, entry, part 2) vs Senna and Bellboy (lost, entry) in Figure Skating. Match page: C2 R1 - Bernard Bunsen and Leuca vs Senna and Bellboy
Bernard and Leuca managed to win, but he hit his balls very hard and suffered for it.
Round 2
Cassia Rapsodia (lost, entry) vs Bernard Bunsen (won, entry) in Painting. Match page: C2 R2 - Cassia Rapsodia vs Bernard Bunsen
In France, Bernard became a woman, and Cassia a little girl.
In Cassia’s reality, they had to compete in painting the Eiffel Tower. Bernard’s was technically better but Cassia’s kid painting was more charming so the Gamemaster gave her the win.
In Bernard’s canon reality, they also had six hours to paint the Eiffel Tower, with GM-Chan telling them to relax. Bernard noted that she had cursed them but GM said it was for fun. Bernard tried to focus thinking on his father’s advice but it was all chiding and scolding. Groaning, he asked Cassia what she wanted of the tourney. She replied she wanted to have fun. Thinking of Chadwick’s words, Bernard considered using his zero gun to just kill her in order to win and save his world. However, in the end he simply left. He returned later with cookies for her. Walking across a city that did not exist anymore in his world, he came to understand the point of the round was indeed leisure, so he had a picnic with Cassia.
Cassia later died during the fire started by Bellboy alongside many Crabs, greatly affecting Bernard and her team.
Round 3
Bernard Bunsen (lost, entry) vs Dragon Lady (won, entry). Match page: C2 R3 - Bernard Bunsen vs Dragon Lady
After talking with each other, Bernard decided to forfeit before killing Dragon Lady, turning on a new leaf.
After Crab 2
Despite his efforts to stop Chadwick Bernard could not stop the sergeant’s wish to create a perpetual CRAB tournament. As a known objector to Chadwick and defiance to his rule and wish Bernard became imprisoned at the bottom of the Bucket and remains there quietly working out and biding his time awaiting a future crab he can implore to undo the future that is Chadwick.
During the events of Crab 3, he met in the prison with Awesoman, who had been locked as well due to being part of the rebellion. He explained the hero the situation regarding the wish and both were ultimately rescued by Wietse and Evelin - the four of them battling through the Nuremberg gnomes. Before the battle concluded, however, Berbie made his own wish in his match sending Bernard and every other Crab from the first two tournaments back to their unified worlds inside a marble, meaning the man went back to his world with the memories of the tournament wiped clean.
Relationships
Life Within CRAB
He had a good friendship with Leuca, and got along with his team - however, he was the first and most prominent opposer to Chadwick’s rule, and thus made one of his most secure prisoners.
Gallery
Gallery
Trivia
- Manly chest hair.
- Bernard comes from the same world and timeline as Frankie Fisher from Crab 3.
- Despite being partners in the job, Clovis Cardige and Bernard are not from the same timeline. Bernard’s timeline is ahead of Clovis’ by a month.
Source
Text: CRAB WIKI, Bernard Bunsen (revision 2529, 2026-05-29; by Sahxyel, Fresbi)
Pictures: Bernard small.PNG, uploaded to the wiki by Sahxyel
Edited by: G
Licence: text CC BY-SA 4.0; characters, comics and art belong to their creators
